Dear Nicole – “My Husband Won’t Talk About What Happened”

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Dear Nicole,
My husband cheated, I forgave him but
he won’t talk about what happened and why.
He said, “just get over it”.I can’t just
get over it. I’m still hurting.
                  Signed – Help!
Dear Help,
I can’t tell you how many times I get this question from women
still dealing with the aftermath of infidelity.Overcoming an affair is a process and
dealing with the “Why?” is the most difficult part. Some get to this point and stay stuck.
“he won’t talk about it”
It is extremely hard for the man to open up not knowing what your reaction will be.
One thing we do know is that it won’t be a fun or happy conversation, but it must be done to move forward.There will be tears and hopefully grace and forgiveness. Look at this as part of the healing process, which it is.
When this conversation takes place, please don’t become defensive and argumentative because once you do, that
may make your spouse shut down. At first, I became defensive but that was a train wreck. My husband shut down
and it took days for him to open back up.
Explain to your spouse how important this conversation is to you for the sake of your
marriage and healing process. Pray about it and allow God to work it out.
Once he does open up, I can almost bet you won’t like the reasons for the affair. But it is what it is. If you decided to
forgive and move forward, do just that.

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